Contraceptive Shades Needed – Chapter 9, Act 1, Strip 34

To be completely stereotypical, which of course would have been appropriate for a B-movie, Mori-senpai would have had to describe his tea as “Earl Grey, hot”. Since that is the phrasing used by Captain Jean-Luc Picard, who was the inventor of tea…for the purposes of popular fiction, that is. I’ve still decided to deviate from this time-honored tradition for two reasons…firstly, I don’t actually like Earl Grey tea…and secondly, I see no reason why somebody who prepares his tea without the help of a replicator should have to specify that it’s hot. Any non-scifi methods of preparing tea involves heating the stuff at some point or other…

Gregory, however, doesn’t seem to terribly enjoy his tea, anyway. In fact he does seem a bit preoccupied by something, with perhaps even a slight hint of nervousness. I guess it’s understandable…there was quite a bit of ominous build-up in the run-up to his meeting Mori-senpai, but it obviously didn’t prepare Gregory for just how sparkly he actually is. He is definitely a lot more sparkly up close than even Mopey’s BFFs credited him for – possibly because they’ve never dared to get that close to him. They are girls, after all, so their risk of catching pregnancy from Mori-senpai’s sparkliness is even higher than Gregory’s – since the latter would have to jump over the mpreg threshold first, which isn’t that trivial, even in manga-inspired fiction. Gregory feels, however, like he’s inching closer and closer to that line under the point-blank impact of Mori-senpai’s sparkliness and friendliness.

He wouldn’t need to worry, though…while mpreg does feature in quite a number of fictional universes, the one he inhabits has an iron rule in place that will reliably prevent Gregory from getting preggers right now. The iron rule being that Snuka is this universe’s butt-monkey, so if any of the male characters were to get pregnant, it would be Snuka first and foremost. Since Snuka is at a safe distance from Mori-senpai, he’s not at all likely to get impregnated, and that means that Gregory is safe for the time being. Not that he could muster enough rational thinking right now to actually realize that…

More on Thursday.

2 Replies to “Contraceptive Shades Needed – Chapter 9, Act 1, Strip 34”

  1. Ok, now it becomes clear: he is evil.
    Personal space is a sacred thing. Only villains would violate it that easily. Good guys usually need several months and a bottle of alcohol before that.

    1. In Mori-senpai’s defense, he might need to get close to people in order to see them clearly – after all, he’s got all of those sparkles in his field of vision all the time.

      But there’s another argument to be made in favor of Mori-senpai potentially being evil: I’m simply too cynical for writing unironically friendly and helpful characters. XD

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