Spared No Expense – Chapter 9, Act 2, Strip 47

If your job is informing the wider public of the start of some kind of major sportsball event, an obligatory part of your ‘reporting’ will involve laying out in great and irrelevant detail just how much effort has gone into preparing for the event. Ideally, with high price-tags attached.

To the best of my knowledge, this is not done in order to criticize the sportsball event as a major waste of money, as you would expect, but rather in order to… I dunno…entertain? I guess the underlying problem is that the start of such an event doesn’t actually provide a lot of newsworthy facts beyond the one that the event in question has started. The next set of newsworthy facts would be the results, and those can’t be reported at the start of it – even in cases where the results are fixed before the event, the press is embargoed from reporting on them before the end of the final game.

In this specific case, though, it’s still kinda interesting to see. Given how both death as well as world wars tend to be rather chaotic affairs on average, it merits noticing that World War Death seems relatively well organized. The stadium is the usual kind of megalomaniac eyesore, and the pipe systems seems ahead even of what Rome’s Colosseum featured in its heyday as a sports venue. And the memorial to past teams seems very…orderly.

In a further sign of aspiration to be the best, a world-renowned inventor was charged with designing the raffle drum for determining the placement of teams into the tournament schedule. And the drawing process will be supervised by an expert determined by the raffle drum itself…so, naturally, it’s Bernd das Brot, who always gets selected by any raffle drum designed by Briegel dem Busch. Trust me on that one. >_>

More on Thursday.

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