This year I felt like doing a Christmas special again. For one thing, update day fell directly on Dec. 25th, and for the other thing, Snuka’s poetry corner provides the perfect framework for commemorating a holiday in a classy and high-brow way.
The cheese poet, James McIntyre, unfortunately let me down, as far as a suitable holiday poem is concerned – but fortunately you can always count on that other stalwart of English poetry, William Topaz McGonagall. Recited above you’ll find his work “A Christmas Carol”, with suggestions on how to celebrate Christmas morn, and why. I left out the chorus supposed to follow every verse, though, it goes:
Then ring, ring, Christmas bells,
Till your sweet music o’er the kingdom swells,
To warn the people to respect the morn
That Christ their Saviour was born.
I think it took a man of McGonagall’s unique talent to create a poem like this, which cannot possibly cause offence to anybody, of any faith or none – since it can be readily read as either an authentic, heart-felt statement of faith, or as a parody thereof, at the reader’s preference. Snuka’s flat performance should add to that effect.
More on Monday.