Sir Justin rises – Chap. 5, Act 4, Strip 57

OMG, Mopey is the l33t h4xx0rz! Well, at least by the definition of “hacking” that movie scriptwriters seem to use (as well as people who forget to log out from their facebook accounts). Although admittedly, it was a bit more complex than just clicking at the icon. First, she had to guess Dr. Fu’s password to get the laptop out of hibernation…but, yeah, it was “gouda”, as anybody would also have guessed correctly at the first try.

But tsk, tsk, I’m seriously disappointed by Mopey and the Professor, here. I mean, I had little doubt that Biff would fall asleep while trying to follow the intricacies of Dr. Dutchman Fu’s master plan for world domination, his eternal happiness and the misery of everyone else ™.

But for a scientist there’s little excuse, given how they should really now how to deal with treatises that are overly long, repetitive, boring and of byzantine complexity. Heck, I bet they’ve both written stuff like that themselves, especially the Professor. (And the Professor, in addition, has then gone on to grade people on their ability to wade through his drivel.)

OK, I’ll try to summarize Dr. Fu’s plan as quickly and simply as possible. It’s a bit like the thing with the lost nail, the lost horseshoe and the lost war, just with a screw instead of a nail. An act of sabotage intended to turn a near miss for Winston Churchill into a direct hit, leading to his death in 1899. (Apparently, he still got married afterwards, but I couldn’t leave half the tombstone blank, could I?) Due to his historical stature (not I’m not riffing on his weight), this has far-reaching consequences.

For one thing, a slight reallignment of British foreign policiy leads to the alternate timeline not having a Field Marshal Bernard Law Montgomery, 1st Viscount Montgomery of Alamein, but a Herr Generalfeldmarschall Bernhard von Gomersberg. I think it’s pretty obvious and easy to follow up to here…

With Britain sunk so low, apparently a couple of hundred steps later, they even give a knighthood to Justin Bieber…I’d assume that that would be after everyone else already had one…

…and some years…or decades? later…Rome is reduced to a rural village, which is…I guess…

…uh…a consequence…

…zzzz…
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..zz..* huh? Uh…Oh…more on Monday…

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