SOREM – Chap. 5, Act 4, Strip 25

Sonic sez: Don’t fall asleep behind the wheel! It’s super bad, and not cool at all! …and what are you even doing watching Sonic SatAM if you’re old enough to drive?

Yeah, Sonic’s got a point, there. Not exactly a sterling performance by the Professor. Perhaps even a tiny little bit irresponsible, if you’re extremely anal about trifles like running Biff over, and are generally a drag at parties.

But in his defence, he’s being irresponsible in the most responsible way possible. If you absolutely have to fall asleep behind a steering wheel, a rail-bound vehicle is a much safer choice than a street-bound one. And the armoured car isn’t that fast, anyway, the tracks are mostly deserted due to the war, and Biff would have gotten run over in any case.

In fact, I think the defence just outlined is so great, the Professor won’t even have to fall back on his second line of defence, his high age. That second line is pretty effective in its own right, but he’s got some mental hang-ups about having to employ it.

More on Monday.

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