In actuality, a shell from Big Bertha weighed some 820 kgs, so to give William the required margin of safety, our friends should really be standing somewhere beyond the horizon, and be targeted via an observation balloon. But that might have been too complicated a set-up, even by B-movie villains standards, generous as they normally are when it comes to allowing for bizarrely overcomplicated means of hero-disposal. Plus the Kaiser wouldn’t have had a good view in that case, since he probably wouldn’t have been willing to ride in the balloon.
Our heroes’ short respite also allows Dr. Dutchman Fu a final opportunity to polish his credentials as a gentleman villain – since he’s no longer the chief or main villain, he can easily do that. And this way, Gawainhodouholein at least can’t say she didn’t get anything out of her involvement, even if it ended up serving mostly decorative functions. (And yeah, for the purposes of having gouda available, the non-existent pockets of Dr. Dutchman Fu’s robes can be assumed to be practically bottomless thanks to trans-dimensional technology, allowing him direct access to the source of all cheesy matter at the center of the Milky Way.)
More on Monday.