As good old Otto von Bismarck used to say, “To retain respect for sausages and laws, one must not watch them in the making.”* It’s basically the same with Gak, just minus the ‘respect’ thing. >_>
But, for better or worse, now you know how it’s made. And you’ll probably also realize now why there are such prolonged gaps in its availability. Gak is generally not available when the forces of evil lie dormant…but when the things that gnaw the world start to stir in the shadows, the approach of their hosts of devastation is always heralded by an advance guard of countless slime creatures…
…and that means happy hunting for adventurers, and good business selling the slimy remains to traveling salesmen!
The salesmen transport the slime to the great Gak-pits at the shores of the Purple Sea, and there its filtered**, separated by color and bundled with accessories for sale to children. Because, frankly, who else would buy something that disgusting?
Everyone’s happy – the children, the salesmen, and the adventurers. The slimes probably aren’t happy, but since they belong (in spite of their gaudy coloring) to the forces of evil, being happy would be against type for them.
Aside from that, the whole thing also goes to show how teamwork in a group of adventurers is supposed to work. A barbarian might be best suited to deal with a group of attacking slimes, but it takes a magic-user to think of a way to profit from the bodies! Well, a thief might have though of it, too…but Biff isn’t here, and also not yet truly at home in his new identity…while Snuka, for the first time in his life, is forced to consider he might no longer even qualify as a proper thief…
More on Thurs…uh, Monday.
* Although it seems like this aphorism actually originates with John Godfrey Saxe. But who has ever heard of him?
** Kids don’t like to have the eyeballs still in there.