The Tale Darkens – Chapter 7, Act 2, Strip 65

DM continues his tale, which turns into a sorry tale in this leg of the narration…after describing the glory that was, he now has to deal with the inevitable passing of that glory.

I’ve spoken to him about the issue with his visuals, and he said he’ll try his best to raise the level for today’s offering. So let’s see…I think the visuals for the dark cloud rising in the east* beyond the mountains are pretty much spot on. Could be slightly more fantasyish, if you want to be nitpicky, but overall a good effort.

The struck boy-king in panel two…well, here DM might have gone too far into the opposite direction. >_> Patalliro’s actual appearance might be sub-par for an idealized boy-king of lore…but his self-image, as depicted here, might be slightly…above par. >_> *cough* DM’s probably really watching too much anime. Nice touch with the roses and sleeping-for-a-century thing. Mixing in a little bit of classic fairytale stuff can do a lot.

Panel three…just perfect. You couldn’t come up with a more fitting visual for a feckless rogue who would steal a kingdom’s happiness for ten zeni. NB, this is not Snuka himself…it’s just that Snuka (the classic version, not the current one) comes so close to embodying the platonic ideal of a feckless rogue (who would steal a kingdom’s happiness for ten zeni) that he and the idealized image are hardly distinguisable. The ideal doesn’t have Snuka’s characteristic birthmark, though, but that’s not really visible right now.

As for panels 4 and 5, I’d rate the visuals as effective, if not really original. Or pretty. All in all, I’d rate DM’s effort today as a solid 8.5 of 10, so definitely on the right track, but some distance left to go.

And you gotta admit, he even goes a bit above and beyond on that last bit…trying to handwave why the forces of good only get their move on after everything has already gone to pot. Most often, that point isn’t even adressed.

More on Thurs…uh, Monday.

* It’s not my fault that it’s always the east where those dark clouds rise, it’s just a literary convention that can’t be broken.

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